Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Date Night...with half naked women!!!

So, I had a date the other night. My dear hubby was wonderful enough to buy me season tickets to the Broadway wannabe Shows in the nearby "big city" for our anniversary or my birthday or something (no, I am not a terrible wife for forgetting which holiday said wonderful present came on because I have more important things to worry about like whether or not my son took his lunch to school today!). So anyway, this series has consisted of four seperate shows and since they all sounded good to me but not necessarily good to dear hubby, I opted to leave him home and take a friend instead.

The first show was "Evita" and wasn't spectacular. I took my best friend Kit to that one. The second was a Cirque Du Soleil look-alike that was fantastic. The third was "A Christmas Carol" and was solidly okay. I let my dear hubby accompany me to both of those and he didn't fall asleep so I am guessing that he didn't think they were too bad. The last in the series was "Chicago" and that was my date night with my friend CrazyK. Here is what we did and heard and saw that night...

CrazyK and I started out the night with dinner at Panchero's. We got really great tasting cheap mexican food that is made fresh in front of you by completely rude Spanish speaking morons in ugly gray t-shirts and dirty aprons. I personally do not have a problem with Spanish speaking people (I even speak a bit of their language) however, these two were just rude! It was obvious by their body language and speech patterns that they were commenting on how absolutely freaking sexy the two of us were, but as you know from my other post, I am not all that keen on men showing their outward affection towards my ungodly attractiveness. So....I ignored them! I know, can you believe it? I didn't say a word to anyone other than CrazyK when we sat down. I HATE bad customer service but their antics just served to make me smile. Thanks for the meal, apron wearing morons.

Anyway, the play was great. Better than great really. I mean, what more could we have asked for? All of the women were dressed in black, tight bras and panties and nighties and see-through body suits and all the men had their bare chests exposed with black vests and tight black pants. Plus, there was signing and dancing and women on trial for murdering their men and a big, fat black woman that just made you want to hug her and her "Mama Morton" attitude of "you rub my back and I'll rub yours." It was great! Just great!

The only downfall...why in the hell do you put in a women's bathroom with three stalls when you know full well that you have a theater with several hundred women that will ALL undoubtedly have to use the restroom during your measly 10 minute intermission??? And why in the fuck is there never enough paper towels to accomodate said hundreds of women??? The paper towels were long gone by the time I hit the stall and therefore me, and the fifty or so girls lined up behind me had to do the *shake, shake, look around so no one sees, wipe on beautiful Play-Going dress thing. Needless to say, I was a couple minutes late getting back into my seat and missed a song! Argh! It was still much fun and well worth the effort to go, though.

As we are walking to the car after the play, a ghost starts up an SUV (technology at it's finest when us Americans can't even get off our lazy asses anymore to start the car--this is a group of citizens that does NOT include me but ONLY because I am more cheap than I am lazy!), a new Denali runs into a barrier (let's see, huge SUV vs. wooden barrier put up to restrict access to a certain turn...which one do you think won? Yeah, the Denali scraped his bumper just so that he could get out of the crowded parking lot 2.36 minutes faster. Impatient much?), and a motor home pulls away throwing sparks from its mudflaps (and continued to throw sparks for 15 miles down the interstate!).

The whole night was great fun, it's really to obad that the season is over. Now where do I take my dates???

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