Do you ever watch those cheesy movies on Lifetime? Cheesy not because of their content but because of the two-bit actors/actresses, the over played drama and the overdone themes. You know the ones I am talking about. You have all seen at least one. I have seen several. On occasion.
When I am feeling introspective about my life. When I want something of a pick me up, a happy ending, I tune in to that channel to watch one of their romance novels on the screen. When I am in a mood to try and find hope in this world via problems that are way bigger than mine, I tune in to one of their true to life someone-stole-my-baby movies. The movies always deliver a plethora of emotions and a ladder up and out of whatever funk I am currently residing in.
On New Years Day, Lifetime aired a "Ring in the Romance" marathon of movies. Betcha can't guess the theme! Okay, well maybe you can. :) Anyway, I DVR'd a movie called "Chaos Theory". I was enchanted with the title, the actor was someone I recognized and the beginning caught our attention nicely.
A New Years Eve party in a swanky city bar. 6 friends sitting on couches around a coffee table are discussing their resolutions. The main woman stands, walks overtop the table and says that her resolution is to find a husband...and she is going to pick from her friends. The men start clawing over each other for this "miraculous chance". It is settled that she will choose her husband from amongst the four men (one of who is with his woman at the time) solely based upon the name of his penis.
Really? Do guys really name their penis's? Is that really something that any self respecting woman would base a life-long decision on? The name of a ding-a-ling? Really? Hmmm. Although I am now extremely curious as to whether or not men name them and what exactly they choose for names. What is the selection process for something like that? What are his thought processes?
I am going to name my member today. What will I call him? Hmmm...
Princess SophiaNope, too girly. Squishy, SquishyOh, not the right impression. Mr. EdMay not live up to it's name.
Gunther. Yeah, that one may work. Sounds strong and manly. I'll go with that.
How about women? Do women name their parts, too?
The left one is Everest and the right is Kilamanjaro.
What the hell? Really?
Oh, the va-jay-jay? I call it Mount Vesuvius on account of the fact that it erupts violently.
Wow! This post sure has gotten off track. Completely. And taken a slight turn to the left. Oops. Okay what was my point again? Oh yeah!
So I DVR'd this movie and watched it the other day when I wasn't having to deal with Hubby's and kids and noise (because I hate those things when I am trying to escape into a tv show or movie!). The movie itself was weird and random and not really all that great if I am being honest, which apparently I am, but it ended with the most amazing monologue that I had to rewind and write, rewind and write, rewind and write until I had it all taken down on paper.
"Well, it turns out that there are few things more chaotic than the beat of a human heart. Speeding up, slowing down, a pretty face, a flight of stairs...it's always changing depending on what's happening to us out there. It's an erratic son of a bitch. But underneath all of that bumpity-bump mess, there is, in fact, a pattern. The truth. And it's love.
The most important thing about love is that we choose to give it and we choose to receive it making it the least random act in the entire universe. It transcends blood, it transcends betrayal and all of the dirt that makes us human."
Deep stuff, huh? Yeah that's what I thought, too. Those sentences, those words, smacked me so hard in the face that day, that I found myself taking a step backwards, looking around at my family and being entirely encased in a gratitude unlike any I have ever felt.
My friend once told me she didn't believe in marriage because she believed that it was basically a cop out, in my understanding. She said that married people wake up everyday next to their spouse and feel obligated to stay because they are married, because they made the choice to get married once when they were head over heels in love and continue to stay that way to avoid the hassle.
As an unmarried woman, she woke up every day next to her partner and made the choice to stay even though she always had the option of a semi-hassle free parting of ways. She felt that everyday choice was more significant than the one-time choice of getting married to begin with.
I partially agree with her.
But, internet, the truth is this. I live in a chaotic world, but amongst that chaos is the truth that no matter what my past holds, my husband wakes up and chooses to love me and I wake up and choose to love him every single day.
And for that I am grateful. And beyond blessed.